they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
