I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
