oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize