How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
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