He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
