I think my fart just growled at me.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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