More tranny stories later!
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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