i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
