hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
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