I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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