So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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