when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
