This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
