ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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