i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
