high people should be assigned attendants
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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