No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
