guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
