did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
