the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
i now understand why vodka
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
