My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
