take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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