i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
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