Where is the hickey?
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
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Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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