so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
