If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster