no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
