69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
