I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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