i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
