he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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