My brain says no but my pants say off.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
