Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(718): View more from New York

3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight

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(586): View more from Michigan

If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me

Fav 2 968 1271
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(619): View more from California

DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.

Fav 18 1084 3390
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(318): View more from Louisiana

Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?

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(763): View more from Minnesota

Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.

Fav 9 5252 1193
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(607): View more from New York

How high are you?

(413): View more from Massachusetts

I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth

Fav 5 1522 711
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(712): View more from Iowa

there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen

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