I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
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Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
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Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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