real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
The air was thick with penises
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
