doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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