i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
you win again, gameday.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
