I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
