Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
