Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
