Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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