i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Quick, to the slutcave!
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
