wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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