i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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