I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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