capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Randomize
