Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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