..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
