Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize