And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He shit in the fireplace
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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